I am always convinced that despite making sales, despite being passionate, and despite loving the work that I do; that I will constantly be the “least productive” artist. It is a feeling I associate back to my anxiety disorder, a mental health issue that frequently makes me feel “othered” or not worthy of the praise I receive as an artist. My mental health has been difficult to manage (to put it lightly) for about ten years. I have struggled with addiction, anxiety, depression, and I have been tested for ADD, BPD, and NPD none of which I ended up being diagnosed with. But the imposter syndrome that lingers in my brain seeps into my art and makes me feel inferior. I will never be good enough. I will never be the best. My projects won’t take off. I will fail.
These fears are so common in the artist community and there has never been much for me to say in response to them. Whenever a friend or fellow artist shares these fears with me, the easiest thing to do is respond with an “LOL Same..”. It is so easy to share that feeling with others. Like a warm embrace that says ‘let’s be garbage together’. I have long wondered what a good response would be to the artists who wonder “What do I do about imposter syndrome”. I just hope one day to find an answer.